My web commercial spots of me and Harold (the car) are available to view online!

Spot #1



Spot #2





(thanks lis for the code to embed this.)


Don't blink.

I don't have much new to report other than this show is wiping me clean straight away.

I wanted to push the last blog about my stalker down, so here's something for you to read... It's my "Rants and Raves" article that I wrote for NYFA (New York Foundation for the Arts). Ooh! Fancy!

http://www.nyfa.org/level3.asp?id=529&fid=6&sid=17


My Bay area dates are available. Check it and spread the word because this show isn't going to pack itself!

WONG FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO’S NEST
WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY KRISTINA WONG
DIRECTED AND DRAMATURGED BY KATIE PEARL AND LEILANI CHAN
December 9, 2006, 8pm
Wong Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest— the full length premiere!
La Pena Cultural Center
3105 Shattuck Avenue, Berkeley, CA
$12, $10 students w/ID.
http://lapena.org/event/319


December 15-16, 2006, 8pm
Wong Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest
MACLA, Movimiento de Arte y Cultura Latino Americana, Inc.
510 South First Street, San Jose, CA
Tickets are $5-10

Now, I've had my fair share of stalkers. I've actually been surprised with the presence of bigbadchinesemama.com and this site that I haven't had more weirdos contacting me, finding my number to call me or showing up at my shows... or my house! (By the way, this is not my invitation for you to do this.) I've had one person call me after looking up my domain name thinking nothing of it or how totally weird this was to call and talk to me like an old friend. I've had a handful of oddball admirers come to my shows after reading about me online. And I do get a small handful of emails that are people who seek me out as some kind of therapist.

But this new story takes the cake.

So I get a call from Lovecraft on Wenesday afternoon. That's where I bought the veggie oil car from and they tend to not call me much.

Brian, the owner, says, "Hey Kristina, we're getting packages from your stalkers now."
.
"What?" I say.

"Yeah, a guy came by with balloons and packages for you. Seems like he's been enamored with your since the article in the Times came out. He asked if you were Korean," Brian says.

"Jesus F-ing Christ," I say, already imagining what this guy so fixated on my "Korean-ness" is like.

So basically, this older white/ Latino guy with a baseball cap named "Amando" or something like that was so fixated with me from the article three months ago, that he placed an ad in the Korean newspaper looking for me. (Damn, I knew I shouldn't have cancelled my subscription to the Korean paper!) And he came into Lovecraft with all these Thanksgiving balloons and a present hoping they would pass it on for me.

Brian and Jason were telling me on the phone that he seems like an "old school" stalker, what with placing an ad in the paper and all. I mean if he really wanted to find me, he just had to google my name. There's way too much info on the internet. And if he did find my site he'd realize the picture from the paper was just a once in a lifetime picture of me looking groomed with make up and fake lashes.

Jason, who works there asked me over the phone, "Hey! Can we open it?"

I said, "Sure, let's see if there's money or yarn in there."

So Jason starts opening the package over the phone and it's this whole yard sale of stuff. A tourist t-shirt from Texas, a teddy bear, a sun visor, a fairy pin. All sorts of strange stuff this guy thought would woo me.

I just kind of laughed it all off. It reminded me of how I used to stalk boys in middle school and what kind of gift I might put together to woo them.

And in an odd way I wasn't too surprised because after the article came out I did get a bunch of weirdos on myspace writing me. But I just shooed them away and posted pics of me with no make up on. And pretty quickly they left me alone.

But the more and more I tell people about this. The more they start building fear in me.

"You better watch out."
"You better lock your doors."
"You better carry pepper spray."


I have a better solution...

Attention stalkers! Please take note of the following. This is what I look life in daily life--



Also note.

1. As much as I don't condone excessive violence, I will stab you in the eye with a knitting needle if you come close to me.
2. Keep placing ads in the Korean paper for me. I swear I'll answer them. Just wait. Hold tight inside your home. Really. Even if it takes years for me to write you. And while you are at it. Try placing ads in the Armenian paper too.
3. Imagine that this shirt I'm wearing smells like cat pee. Yes, 'tis my geisha like reality.

This is the best animation I've seen in forever and perfect for today.

These are really boring and reflect my time in Iowa two weeks ago.

Part 1




Part 2 was too long and was rejected by youtube.


Part 3

Dear Knitters,
Got an old knitting project that you don’t plan to ever finish?
Half done socks?
Five inches of a scarf?
Now they can be part of a touring theater piece!

Help performer Kristina Wong demystify the knitting circle and unravel the deep psyche of the master crafter in her new solo show “Wong Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.” Your donations of unfinished knitting pieces from around the world will be included as part of the set for a live serio-comic exploration of maintaining sanity in times that seem almost fictitious.

All contributors will receive “set construction” program credit for the life of the show. (Please forward this notice to all the knitters you know)

Your friends in crafting,
The Cuckoo’s Nest

WHY UNFINISHED KNITTING?
“Wong Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” originally set out to explore the sky-high rates of mental illness and suicide among Asian Pacific Islander Women. Asian Pacific Islander American women have the highest rates of suicide in the country in a statistic that seems to be widely unpublicized and often disregarded. The unfinished knitting collected represent incomplete intentions, women’s work, “spinning a yarn,” and loneliness. During the show, Kristina uses the knitting pieces to represent “unravelling” women and even unravels some of the pieces during the show. These knit pieces may also be displayed as part of an art installation later in the run.

INSTRUCTIONS FOR SUBMITTING:
Please include the skein of yarn (if there is one) attached to your unfinished knitting. Include the knitting needle it’s sitting on, or if you want to keep you needles, pull some waste yarn through the loops so that your piece doesn’t unravel in the mail.

On a sheet of paper please include the following information. This information is all optional as it may be displayed as part of a public installation of this work.

Name (or alias)
Gender
Age
Ethnic identification
Where do you live/ Where are you from?
What was the original intention when you cast on this piece?
What reasons do you have for not finishing it?
Any information about this piece that is pertinent to its history or to your history.
If you are interested in knowing where “Wong Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest” is touring to, please include your email address.

Note: Your name and hometown must be included if you want to be credited for “set construction.”


DO SEND:
Unfinished knitting, all different shapes and colors that can be unraveled if pulled at the string. This could be the sleeve of a sweater you never finished, the first scarf you started, or any other piece of knitting that for some reason or another you have not managed to finish nor do you anticipate will ever be finished. Knitting that is full of mistakes are as welcome as are perfectly stitched pieces. Unfinished knitting attached to tangled skeins are welcome.

DO NOT SEND:
Finished knitting or store bought knitwear, finished knits that are damaged, anything with more square footage than a baby blanket (3 by 3 feet) or tangled yarn. I am interested only unfinished knitting that has been pulled off the needle and that has the capability of unravelling.

YOUR KNITTING WILL NOT BE RETURNED!
At the end of the run of “Wong Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest,” the remaining pieces will be stitched together to create blankets for charity. Any attached skeins of yarn will be cut and also given to charity.

TIMELINE:
* Knitting received by December 1, 2006 will appear in the Berkeley premiere of WFOTCN on December 9 and the run at MACLA in San Jose December 15-16.
* Knitting received by March 15, 2007 will appear in the East Coast premiere of WFOTCN March 23-24 at the Painted Bride in Philadelphia, PA.
* Knitting may also appear in other national performances of this show.

MAIL YOUR KNITTING TO:
KRISTINA WONG
WONG FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO’S NEST
PO BOX 251664
LOS ANGELES, CA 90025
USA

Please do not send anything COD.

QUESTIONS/ PRESS INQUIRIES?
Http://www.kristinawong.com
k@kristinasherylwong.com

By now, you may have heard of the police tazer incident at UCLA. It's sick and great that we live in an age where it can be captured on camera and posted on youtube. How did the ClICC lab become the equivalent of an Iraqi torture chamber?

I had chills watching this and also a ton of flashbacks of being an undergrad at UCLA, reminded of how incredibly unsafe and useless the UCPD were. Much like the student tasered I can sympathize with being in the computer lab late and needing some extra time to work and not having my ID. But to tazer him repeatedly? In front of that many protesting witnesses? I'm so sad this couldn't be stopped. I'm so sad this happened at my alma mater. And yet, I'm not surprised.

Well well well, after my post about Cedar Rapids, IA being a "shithole" I was surprised with two emails from employees of the Cedar Rapids Area Convention & Visitors Bureau who found my blog and told me all of the things I missed on my visit to the great state of Iowa.

According to them, I missed quite a lot of the museums and fine dining that Iowa had to offer.

And apparently, according to them, my attitude stinks. And it was suggested that I crochet myself a bag to hold my "bad attitude."

They misunderstood me, the fact that there were crochet mags at their airport was the highlight of the trip. Also that sign in the middle of an empty field that said "God is pro-life"-- that was the other highlight.

One of them offered to send me a visitors guide for 2007. That's very sweet.

I take it back. I take it all back. Cedar Rapids is not a shithole. But they could stand to get a good Thai food place in there.

So as many of your know I have been making my living as of late on the educational and non profit theater circuit, doing shows and residencies at schools. Spreading knowledge and madness to young college aged kids.

It seems though as of late that budget cuts are really taking a toll on the touring artist economy. And the budgets available to bring artists in are shrinking significantly. This means we have to get creative and figure out ways to save schools money so they can still get us out there, and so that it doesn't cost us money to take the gig. For example, when I was in Michigan last week, my tech and I stayed in someone's home, instead of a hotel, so that I could afford to pay the tech person.

I was just at the National Performance Network meeting in Iowa last week where another artist suggested getting airline miles donated to alleviate that expense for schools. What a great idea I thought! Travel expenses usually make up a bulk of the cost to get out to whatever city I'm going to. If I could help schools nix that expense, then I could put more money towards making the production better and preventing a nervous breakdown for me.

So here it is. My little bitty offer. Transfer your frequent flyer miles balance to me (in any amount) and I will knit you a scarf as my little thank you! God knows I have the yarn to do it. I fly on most of the domestic airlines especially American, Northwest, and United. But I've also flown on ATA, Midwest, Frontier, and the others. Who knows, whatever the airline, I'm sure it will add up to whatever tiny balance I have and eventually spell out to a free flight to wherever I am touring to. I know Southwest tends to expire in one year or something like that, so not sure if I can use that unless you have a significant amount of miles, but I pretty much have accounts on most of the airlines. I don't fly much internationally though I am planning to eventually play to English speaking countries abroad like Australia, parts of Europe, Hong Kong and Canada-- so international miles are useful.

Interested? k@kristinasherylwong.com


I love you forever!

Love,

kristina

ps I hope this doesn't come off as desperate. I really saw it as a practical and smart request myself.

I got back last night from that shithole called Cedar Rapids, Iowa. I was there for a performance conference. Can I blame kids for picking up a meth problem when they live in places like that? Man, that place was a ghost town. So boring. And the food was so bad. The last night they had a big dinner for everyone and it was catered. That food was actually good and everyone stood up to applaud the kitchen because it was the first time any of us had anything good to eat in days.

What made the exit out of Cedar Rapids even more challenging was that I missed my flight and was wandering around the Cedar Rapids airport for an extra 4 hours. I must say that it was the first airport I've been to that I've seen crochet magazines at. However, the rest of the selection was crapola. Trashy novels and mechanics mags. Ugh. I was so dying bored, ready to shoot myself. My computer freaked out and couldn't start up and so I couldn't get any work done.

Anyway, today was my day to get settled back in at home. I opened up a shipment of 100+ skeins of yarn. yay! I have a problem and I don't care. I'm so excited about the year of knitting ahead.

Then I went to the Apple store on the promenade only to find that they were booked for the day, I went to Vince's place in a panic. Vince fixed me up! It was really scary because he was popping all sorts of disks in and couldn't get the computer to start up, then he firewired my computer to his and was able to repair the computer from his screen. Yay! Vince is my mac genius!

Anyway, I'm just hanging out here at Vince's waiting for my Microsoft entourage whatever it's called to repair itself.

I'm home in LA for two weeks until I leave for the Bay Area.

Woo woo!

My show was last night and let me say I turned what was an otherwise shit set up into a pretty damn good show! People in Michigan get me! The last time I did a gig here was that high school conference where my ass was handed to me by kids who weren't interested in listening to anything that didn't involve cheering on the Pistons.

We didn't have a real theater to do the crazy thing that was my show, though it was technically an "amphitheater." We couldn't hang my yarn set (not allowed and impossible), had to push the lectern (which all the bells and whistles were controlled from, as opposed to a tech booth) into a closet. My tech Jen was great and discreetly popped into and out of the closet to turn the lights on and off to accomodate my ridiculous power point demonstrations.

And it was totally packed! This is really rare for college gigs because usually kids get so busy or jaded they don't come to stuff. But this was packed. People in the aisles! Insane! And they stayed the whole hour. Nuts! It also helped that two classes were assigned to come to the show.

Lots of people, grad students, older people, grad and undergrad students, and oddly enough, babies were in attendance. For me. Little old me.

Turns out I have more friends than I thought in Ann Arbor. My prom date from high school, Chris Bess, who goes to law school at U Mich came and brought his cute law school friends. We took a pretend prom picture.



It was fun, I totally improvised a moment in the show where I pointed him out and talked about how we went to prom together and didn't have sex.

Yes, that's lipstick on my face.


The questions were so intelligent too. I really felt people got the nuances of this new show. It's a real new direction for me because this show is a lot more holistic than "Free?" which was really modular and I'm playing with some really huge concepts and trying not to rely too much on cheap and easy answers.

I still have a lot of work to do on the show before I officially premiere in Berkeley next month, but I feel really good about it, especially after last night's show.

I teach a writing workshop later today and head off to IOWA.

Yay for good people in the Midwest!

I must say one of the perks of this job is the exciting locales I get to travel to. Here I am in Sunny Ann Arbor, Michigan where last week it was 20 degrees. This week it's in the 60s thankfully. I go off to Cedar Rapids, Iowa later this week.

I do a full reading of the show tonight. I had to get a massage last night. Both my tech and I were tight muscled and screwed up and we found a guy on Craigslist who was thankfually not scary and totally legit but now we wake up and both our backs are so sore.

This show is still being written in my head. Oh god. I decided to just laugh through it if I can't figure out what to do. I still don't have a decent ending. A "reading" isn't really "a reading" for me because I don't really do good with standing in one place and reading. Instead I have yarn, slide shows of import models that I will dance to, and in lieu of memorizing text, I put some planted lines in slide shows that I can read from.

Our hosts have been great to us and seem to think that it will be brilliant. And tonight's show is at this Amphitheater which promises to be packed.

Man oh man. I need to let go.

I am rushing off to a wedding. Here's my present for the bride and groom...





Screw gift registries. From now on, I'm making stuff. Well, maybe I won't make blankets for everyone getting married, but it feels so nice to actually craft someone a gift.

It took 30+ skeins of new and partial skeins. yay! That helped cut down my stash a lot and makes up for the fact that 300+ skeins of yarn are coming in the mail for me. It was easy to make, just took a lot of episodes of LOST to watch. I basically just did a color gradiation and did a continuous shell stitch. Was going to make it bigger but threw the towel in last night. It looks pretty. What do you think?


I'm at this wedding all day and plan to work on some of my props at the wedding! yes! my sets are all knitted! Ugh! I can't wait to quit performance art and be a poet or stand-up or something else that does not require props.

love,

k

I've been back in LA since Monday. My computer went buggy. My printer went buggy. I spent hundreds on yarn last week (I justify it as a business expense because I am using a lot of knitting in my show) and on my bike ride home last night felt like I had a drug problem for being so apey about yarn. I was contemplating doing a videoblog where I cried and cried and someone out there would pity me enough to send me a big fat check.

Instead I did this...

I went to Staples.
I bought a corkboard.
I wrote myself a check for a million bucks and pinned it smack in the middle of the board.
I also cut out pictures of houses in the Real Estate section that I want to live in and pinned it to the board.
I started working on what my obituary would look like. The awards I would win in my lifetime, the businesses I would own, the books and movies I'd make.
I whited out the names on the PEN Literary Awards mailing I got and filled in my name in all categories.

I put the board in front of my desk where I can look at it every day.

The show looks like shit still, I put it up in less than a week in Michigan.

But I feel great! And so much less stress! I really recommend that everyone buy a corkboard for visualizing their dreams.

Also, thank you to Terry in Canada who bought me two knitting books off my wishlist! They are my favorite books now! When I am in the midwest next week (Michigan and Iowa), I will be working on your scarf. It's butt cold there. like in the 20s. YIKES! But in Canada it's worse apparently.

Btw friends, if you need a scarf in the winter, the promise still goes as follows. Buy me something off my wishlist, and I'll send you a warm handmade scarf or hat right back! God knows I have the yarn to do it.